Beyonce’s Bustin’ Out at the MTV Awards

This dress almost defies description.  It’s space age meets corrugated iron.  The issue I have with it – I understand it’s a costume for a performance, not something she’s likely to wear walking down the street – but it’s the fact that her black bike shorts appear to be busting out of the sides of the ‘dress’.

Oh my, oh my, oh my…

Beware the Diverging Diagonal on Your Hips

Anne Hathaway’s dress has some diverging diagonal lines that make her hips look wide – it you want to up your curve quotient, go for this, but if you don’t as you feel your hips are wide enough already.

Beyonce Shows How Not to Wear Horizontals

 

This is image consulting 101 – never put a horizontal line across a wide point, unless you want it to look wider.  Now if Beyonce’s booty is her widest point, why would she put a glittery, spangly, sequined wide horiztonal band across it to draw attention to it?

How can she get something so basic so wrong?

How to Make your Thighs Look Slimmer – By Not Wearing Beyonce’s Dress

Beyonce is wearing a trapeze dress which does nothing for her figure – she has a gorgeous small waist and curvy body, yet the dress is disguising her waist and ending right at the widest part of her thighs, which is making them look bigger, and her whole body look much boxier.  This style of dress is really only suited to those with an I shape (boyish) body, which can take the shape and length, best avoided by most curvier women.

Denim Don’t if You Want Slimmer Hips

Rachel Bilson is wearing a pair of jeans with whiskering at the crotch, which when she’s placed next to a group of ultra thin models, is making her look very curvy in the hips.

If you’d like to make your hips look slimmer,  avoid this kind of detailing on jeans.  Since a fair proportion of women have issues with their hips, I don’t understand why jeans designers keep adding it to their denim ranges as it would cost them extra in production.

If you want more tips on how to choose jeans, check this out.

How to Choose the Length of Your Shorts

Heidi Klum’s shorts are just too short here – when trying to decide how long you should wear them, the rule is to never put a horiztonal line on your widest point – and as you can see, these shorts end right at the widest part of Heidi’s thighs.   A couple of inches longer and she could have carried them off better, but this draws attention and it’s not flattering.

Beware the Horizontal Lines Kate Walsh

In direct contrast to the great dress that Heidi Klum wore to the Emmy’s, this dress worn by Kate Walsh has dominant horizontal lines, in shiny beading, which draws a big nasty line around her hips, and makes her look way curvier than she really is.  Unless you have a boyish shape, I’d avoid wearing a dress like this.

Charlize Theron’s Boxy Plaid Dress

Why oh why is Charlize Theron doing this to herself?  Did someone bet her that she wouldn’t go outside the house in this so called ‘dress’ (which I’d call a ‘nightmare’), it’s a boxy shape, which does nothing for her gorgeous body, except make it look bigger, and the tartan pattern is also boxy, so she just looks like a nasty plaid box.  I know that plaid is supposed to be a big fashion trend, but it’s hard to wear – even for the most gorgeous.  Tread warily.  You have been warned!

Rosario Dawson Shiny Mistake

Here the gorgeous Rosario Dawson is wearing an unfortunate dress, it’s way too shiny, and as I’ve said before, shine makes you look bigger, so she’s gone from being slim to curvier than I think she’d want to be.  The pleats at the hips aren’t helping, and the fact that she appears to have been sewn into the top half of the dress and then a whole lot of extra volume down below adds extra bulk.

Speaking of the top, I have issues with a dress that forces your breasts to sit just under your chin, they should sit no higher than at the point your underarms meet your body, please can’t we have a little more fabric that is a little less constrictive cos they’re trying to escape, but that mesh guard is holding them at bay!

Don’t Try this at Home – Fergies Unflattering Leggings

If you wanted to find a pair of leggings that is surely going to be unflattering, then I think that Fergie has found them, and is wearing them on stage.    The big patterns on the thighs draw attention, the black tops minimise her top half, and then the light coloured boots draw your attention down to her bottom half, giving you no option for your gaze, but to land squarely around her hips and thighs.   Please don’t try this look at home, unless you’re in dire need of a healthy meal.